How Do YOU Get Your News?

Today I had one of those good, long talks with my mom. As we talked, I realized that she was not aware of a few big controversial topics that have popped up recently. And I thought to myself, how does this happen? When she probably watches the news on TV much more often than I do? As I thought about it, I realized that besides word of mouth, Facebook IS my news source. I can't decide whether that's a good or bad thing.

While I should probably expand my horizons, I feel that Facebook is a good way to stay current on the issues that are pertinent to the people my age, right now. And I mean right now as in, almost instantaneous, because Facebook is like a small town where word spreads like wildfire!

Tonight I turned on KSL news for the first time...ever. I discovered that it's not so bad, and that there are quite a few things going on in my own area that I had no idea about. Maybe TV does have its merits. :)

How do you stay informed?

A Letter to the CEO of Carl's Jr.

Dear Mr. Puzder,

During fall of last year I went to a Carl’s Jr. restaurant for the first time, and I enjoyed the meal I was served. However, I recently became aware of Carl Jr.’s advertising campaign which highlights sexualized, scantily-clad women. I feel that using sexualized advertising is a very bad move for your company, for a number of reasons. 

First, you may be targeting young men who will eat a lot, but you are losing many of your loyal customers who would have brought their families along with them. You may not be aware, but after reading the recent Facebook responses to your Heidi Klum and Nina Agdal commercials, it appears to me that a large number of people are boycotting your restaurant altogether, because they are offended by the explicit material that you are trying to persuade them with.

Second, by objectifying women, you add to the stereotype that young girls are fed every day by the media, which is that women have value only if they are “hot”, “skinny”, and “sexy”. By doing so, you add your voice to the many others who falsely tell our sisters and daughters that they are not to be valued for their accomplishments, but for their looks. As a result, many girls who prescribe to such a shallow ideal have experienced many internalizing issues such as depression and eating disorders.

Although sex may earn you a few dollars, remember that long-term relationships are never based on sex only. I implore you rise up and change your advertising campaign to direct towards the whole family, not just towards one narrow group of your customers. I challenge you to create a lasting relationship with your customers by producing commercials that match the taste of your burgers. I would appreciate it, and I know there are many others who would as well. 

Please, win my loyalty back.

Sincerely,

Alison Bennett

Salt Sucks

 One day in class, we were talking about media violence, and how it is a risk factor for aggressive behavior. Yet, it is something that we can definitely control in our lives!! Then my mind went to salt. Why?

My head loves analogies. Through comparisons, I understand things better. Once in a human physiology or anatomy class here at BYU, I learned that however much salt you eat consistently, that's what your taste buds become accustomed to. So, in essence, your sensory neurons become desensitized to whatever level of salt you're feeding yourself. You choose the level of salt, and your body becomes accustomed to it, so that you NEED that amount of salt on your food to feel like you're getting the same effect. Health implications follow.
Whether this is actually right or wrong, it fits with the purpose of this analogy. :)

I thought of the uses and gratifications of violent media, and how people may feel a rush by watching violence, but soon need more to get that same rush of adrenaline. Then, I thought of many people I know who have served missions, who wouldn't touch a violent ANYTHING for months after they get back (making me feel really bad and worldly for even suggesting we watch it. Shoot. Ha.) While we may think of those RMs as out of touch with the "real world", I feel like they're just not horribly desensitized like many of us are.

If we lessen our "salt" (violent media) intake, I think that we'll realize that we didn't need that high amount of salt in the first place. In fact, we may find that our high intake of salt was impacting our health. Little did we know. That's what desensitization does.

Princesses and Prophets

"When I was a kid growing up, my grandmother lived with us,and one of her things was to make sure that I went to bed at night. So she would tell me stories. I wanted to hear Snow White and Cinderella, but she'd always say, 'I can only tell you something that's true.' And so she would tell me the stories of Joseph Smith and the pioneers." --Susan Easton Black

Sometimes, for short spurts of time, life will continually give me a theme to ponder. And sometimes, that theme comes from a media source, with little treasures popping up when I least expect them to. This was such a time. 

I was on Facebook one day, and I stumbled across a New York Times article that someone had posted about how storytelling brings families together and makes them more resilient. The ideas it gave resonated with me. But I soon forgot about it as I went about my daily life, racing my deadlines. 

About a week later, I was reading a random Deseret News article, when I got hit with the idea again. It was the quote you see above, by Susan Easton Black (who is an amazing teacher!) My thoughts immediately went to Dr. Coyne's study on princesses, and how so many girls love and aspire to be like the cartoon princesses.

I wondered. What if we spent as much time teaching our daughters (and sons) about real stories of real people? About our ancestors who faced challenges? About the people we admire? Would our little children have a better sense of who they are? Would they be more resilient and feel more bonded with their families? Would they be stronger for it?

I've never been a very good storyteller, and so I never thought much about the significance of the stories we tell. But as I think about people like Susan Easton Black, whose inspirational career and love of church history was fostered by her grandmother's bedtime stories in her early years, I begin to rethink my paradigm. 

 

Music, Shopping, and Cheesecake

Last month I went to the Cheesecake Factory for the first time (I know, where have you been all my life?!) And one thing I noticed about the experience, other than the food, was that I really loved the music they played. All of it. Maybe I was just in a really good mood for that kind of music, but honestly, that alone makes me want to go back again!

Cheesecake Factory

When I thought about it more, I realized that music has a big effect on me whenever I go into a store. Even silence has an effect. The music or noise I hear can drive me away, or make me want to stay longer (and... spend more money). The other day I went to a pizza place where the one girl there was listening to screamo stuff, and I just wanted to leave. In fact, I did. After we ordered the pizza. The customer service was great, but the music almost drove me away. Music has a powerful effect on the atmosphere of any store, and in extension, it can even determine the success of an establishment.

Miss-representation

As I watched the Miss-representation video in class, I'll be honest. I felt a little sick to my stomach. Why? Because I felt like I had been convinced of a LIE my entire life. The video caused me to take a big step back and look at what kind of belief system I'd been subscribing to since I can remember. I mean, I knew that media is unrealistic for the most part, but little did I know what a huge impact it has on our society, in that I think it is a catalyst for perceived expectation. Here's a few ideas that I liked/thought were profound in the video:

• Media culture (and in extension, society) values the looks of women. How are we to rise above it?
• The media affects the brain on a subconscious level.
• Advertising is based on making people feel anxious, insecure, and therefore moves us to do things to feel more "powerful". 
• Women spend money on cosmetics instead of school--the rhetoric of this "empowerment" is that it completely dis-empowers you.
• Women are objectified in media. We think that they're empowered, so young women try to use their sexuality to become as empowered. 

There were so many more good points, but in short, I want to make sure that I'm a more conscientious consumer of the media, and that from now on, I look hard at the messages that the media is really sending. 

My Laptop. My Life.

I have just a small thought. I write this post, cringing a little as I do. I have a question for you. What would your life be like if you didn't have your laptop? Just thinking about that makes me feel a little bit guilty, because I know that I would have so much more free time to do (in most cases, probably) more meaningful things! My laptop is a powerful tool for good... but it can also be a vice. Why do some of the best gifts to us have such a power to ensnare us as well! It's like a pendulum... the farther it swings one way (for good), the farther it can go the other way (for bad)!

I suppose the only way to solve the problem comes with these two words: responsibility and discipline. I hope that I can continue to develop those, so that I can be better myself and also teach my kids those important principles as well, so that we can all avoid the "technology takeover" and live real, productive, and happy lives!

Powerful Gospel Lessons From... Disney?

This is a post in response to my friend Jenna Berkey's last blog post. She related how she was able to better learn aspects about the gospel through Hercules. Reading this reminded me of a spiritual moment that I had about 8 years ago, when I was new in seminary. I used this clip as a part of one of my devotionals at the beginning of class:

Do I think that we can learn gospel lessons through Disney, or other secular media? Absolutely. I love this example of the Lion King.  I think that a huge part of our conversion process is the realization that Heavenly Father exists, and that we are literally His children. That knowledge has influenced everything about my life, and I believe that everything good that I have in my life comes from that source. There is power in knowing WHO WE ARE, because if we know that, we have a greater capacity to recognize the great potential that we have, and we can work towards it! I think of Simba at the beginning of the clip--directionless. But by being reminded of who he really was, he re-discovered his purpose, and went on to do amazing things. 

And you know what? We have amazing things to do as well. 

Interesting Pinterest-ing

I love Pinterest, for many reasons. Having the convenience of putting all brilliant ideas in one space and NOT LOSING THEM? Bonus! (I tend to lose things a lot!) But yet, I'm not addicted, and I never have been. Maybe it's just not my personality. Or maybe it's because I haven't planned a wedding yet (because I'm definitely using it to help me!) I hear people talk about how they're addicted, and I know that it could happen to me. I need to be careful. 

I love that we have social networks that allow us to connect with people and share ideas. For me, I love home decor and making spaces look good, so for me Pinterest is golden! Or so I thought. Lately I've been having second thoughts. Yes, think that Pinterest has a wealth of great ideas. BUT, what does it do for people, really? Do they end up doing the countless projects that they pin? What about all the fashion posts, the cool hair posts, the motivational get-in-shape posts--do they help? I almost think that "Pinterest-ing", if used improperly, could easily turn into a rabbit-hole of unfulfilled wants, and possibly make us more and more unsatisfied with what we already have. In class, we learned that the more kids watched T.V. and the more exposed they were to advertisements, the more materialistic they were. Could this also apply to sites like Pinterest? I'm still deciding what I think about it.

Advertisements That Rock.

The Sunday after our advertisement lecture, our Relief Society teacher began her lesson with this advertisement, which is part of a campaign called "Lead India." I felt really inspired watching it.

Lead India: The Tree

Another video I just came across: an ad promoting the discontinuation of labeling children with certain disorders. Again, inspired. 

Stop Labeling Children: Anonymous

What is it that makes these advertisements so powerful and inspiring to many people, not just to someone who loves learning leadership principles and is a Human Development major? I think that a good advertisement portrays its message in a way that a lot of people can relate to it. I think that almost all humans are similar in our deep yearnings... a few of which are highlighted in the two commercials above: the need to have meaning and purpose, the need to be understood for who you are, the need to feel loved and appreciated (to name only a few). My favorite advertisements are not those that mostly entertain me (although those are great!)--my favorites are those that inspire me, remind me to be a better person, and leave me determined to change.

The Music In Us.

So, a few weeks ago when we had our music lecture, we talked about how the certain types of music that you listen to the most have been correlated with certain personality traits. That got me thinking a little bit. To what extent do our personalities influence our music choices? And what about the influence of music on our personalities? I definitely think it's a bit of both and then some. I think about the times when I've listened to music that I didn't like at all. It just didn't RESONATE with me, and left me feeling off-ish. Music definitely affects us.

But we also affect music, in that we choose what we consume and produce. And in a way, I think that over time and repeated exposure, the cycle of music-affects-personality-affects-music, etc., influences and becomes a part of who we are. A part of us. I'm reminded of the old MormonAd....

Have you ever heard "you are what you eat"? GROSS!!!!

  For me, this lecture was a reminder that I should be more aware about what music and lyrics I listen to on a day-to-day basis, because it does have an affect. We are made of what we consume. Would you eat a cockroach in a Sundae??

Media: A Safety Net?

Tonight I did something that I have never done before: I went to the volleyball game ALONE. Crazy? Well, no one else wanted to, and I did. Just so you're not waiting in suspense, the game went to 5 sets, and we won by 2 points in the last set!! AMAZING game. I'm so glad I went :)

Taylor Sander was BOSS. :)

That being said, I had an interesting experience being alone. At first I wanted to see if any other of my friends were at the game or would be willing to come, so I was texting people almost constantly during breaks. This may be dumb, but I almost felt like I was safe from the ridicule of other people if they knew that I was important to somebody? Hence, it was safe to have my phone out. But then I thought, dumb! You can definitely be in the moment better if you put your phone away! So I stopped trying to stop being alone, and I decided to enjoy it. And I did.

Another thing I noticed when I put my phone down... I looked around me. And guess what I noticed? TONS of other people on their cell phones, doing whatever, even though all of them were at the game with someone else. Why do we do this?

My dad told me something when I was younger. He said, "Be where you are." I think that's a good way to live, and something that I am also working on. I think that while cell phones and other like media are such a blessing, but at the same time they can hinder relationships. Another experience. I went to Romania for an internship a year ago, and for the first little while, our apartment had no internet. What on earth do you do with no internet?!?! You talk with your roommates. You sit at the dinner table and laugh for over an hour after you've finished eating. We became so close, and had so many good memories during those first few weeks! Now, I realize that school and other responsibilities require media time, and I'm not suggesting dropping media altogether. That would be crazy. But, as President Monson said, "What is most important almost always involves the people around us." Whether it's for security or for other reasons, I think that sometimes we need to take down that "safety net", push out of our comfort zone, and make more of an effort to connect with the people around us. I promise, good things will happen. :)

YOU ARE AWESOME!

When I first heard of blogs, I thought of them as online journals that lonely people used to unleash all of their innermost feelings and hurl them into cyberspace, hoping to get noticed and appreciated. However, this past year I have discovered the power that blogs can have in reaching and influencing large numbers of people. Social media platforms such as Facebook and Pinterest have also aided in the spread of ideas, and through these medium, blogs can be shared and quickly go viral. Blogs unite common voices, without the limitations of need for close physical proximity.

I just want to share a few of the blogs that I have found to be particularly inspiring, have made me think, or have given me that "aha!" moment.  

Drops of Awesome:
http://www.daringyoungmom.com/2012/12/19/drops-of-awesome/

Club Unicorn: In which I come out of the closet on our ten year anniversary:
http://www.joshweed.com/2012/06/club-unicorn-in-which-i-come-out-of.html

My Dirty Little Secret:
http://theexperiencesofapostpartumwoman.wordpress.com/2013/01/30/my-dirty-little-secret/

Simplfy-Idea 1-Dejunking:
http://theexperiencesofapostpartumwoman.wordpress.com/2012/07/12/simplify-idea-1-dejunking/

I'm sure that there are more where that came from. In short, blogs have the amazing ability to bring people together, who, without the technology we have, would probably never have been able to share ideas otherwise.

Book Assignment

I was a voracious reader when I was growing up, beginning from a young age. If you asked me, I would tell you that I could not get enough of them—I read almost every book on our shelves at home. I am going to introduce two of my favorite books, and what impact they had on my life.

In my early adolescence, one top favorite of mine was the Work and the Glory series by Gerald N. Lund, which I read all the way through three times. The books are historical fiction, and follow the Steed family as they discover the restored Gospel of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in its infancy in New York. Most of the family joins the Church, and they go where the Saints go, and experience the joys, hardships, and oppression from Fayette, New York all the way to Salt Lake City, Utah.

I now have a confession to make. Since entering university, I rarely read novels for enjoyment, which is something that I regret. That being said, I will say that the latest novel that I have been able to get my hands on was for my adolescent development class. I read “Matched” by Ally Condie, which I enjoyed very much, so I would have to say that it is my current favorite. The book focuses on the main character, Cassia, who lives in a society where every aspect of your life is controlled, including who you marry. The book follows Cassia as she discovers that she is more than the role that her society places her in. She falls in passionate love with someone other than her “match” (whom she also loves), and she has to choose between complacency and rebellion. If she chooses to rebel, she will most likely lose everything that she holds dear.

I believe that the Work and the Glory series had a great impact on my life. The novels introduced me to a variety of good-natured characters, who I considered humorous and witty. Through their experiences, I learned much about the history of the Church, and I found myself uplifted by the stories (many of them true stories about real people). As I was an early adolescent, I also really enjoyed the love stories. The novels also made the history of the Church very real to me, as I got to experience “first hand” what the early church members went through. I learned about faith, perseverance, love, trust, hatred, and forgiveness, and many other principles. I also felt much more connected to the early prophets of the church, particularly Joseph Smith and Brigham Young. Overall, these books uplifted and inspired me, and strengthened my faith and testimony.

“Matched” also had an impact on me, but to a lesser extent. However, I did connect with the story, as it included major themes of autonomy and identity. Cassia had to choose who she would be, despite the strong outside pressures of society’s expectations of her. I feel like right now in my life, as an emerging adult, I face high uncertainty in the direction my life is going, as well as high expectations. Those high expectations come from many areas, whether it is from family, the Latter-day Saint culture, or friends. Personally, I identified with Cassia because she did not let societal pressures define her, and she made her decisions according to what she thought was right instead of according to what she thought was expected. I feel the same when it comes to decisions in my life—that no matter what people may think is right for me, I still need to follow my heart and my logic. Often my decisions fall in line with the “expected course”, but sometimes they do not. This book influenced me by reminding me that sometimes the best decisions that I can make for my life will not fall in line with what other people think I should be doing. I was also reminded that when making decisions, I need to realize that going off the beaten path of expectation is okay, and I should not let myself become overly stressed or concerned about visible and invisible pressures of expectation.

And Men Think THEY'RE Tough!

I have never gone through childbirth, and I cringe at the thought of it. Of course, I'll do it, mostly because I believe that part of our purpose here is to have families, and I'm excited to have my own someday! But the pain? Not so sure. I'm pretty sure I'm going to have to take some tennis balls and use somebody for target practice! Just kidding. Maybe. :P Here's a popular clip that's going around. I couldn't stop laughing as I watched these two men experience the pains of a two-hour labor.

Oh, and to get the English subtitles, push the "CC" at the bottom, then click on English.

I think that this is popular because everybody likes to see someone else go through something painful (why are we like that?), and it's also intriguing to see a man try to go through an ordeal that has been women's ever since the beginning. For me, I was interested to see if they could actually do it. One dropped out, but I guess, who would want to go through that kind of pain? Just as the one guy said at the end, this video might promote men to think a little harder about getting a girl pregnant. Maybe it could even drop teen pregnancy rates, because it gives people a glimpse of what they're getting themselves into? Who knows.

Mormon Messages

I love the new ways that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has been getting its message out. From Mormon Messages to billboards to "I am a Mormon" ads to bus advertisements in the middle of New York City! I went to New York for the first time this last Thanksgiving break, and just glanced at the bus passing by. I had to do a double-take because of the last part--the words "Jesus Christ." And I thought, who is still brave enough to profess Christ in Manhattan, when many in this country seem to want to remove God from the public domain?

And then I saw the "mormon.org" to the left of the advertisement, and I thought, of course! It's us. :)

Excuse the warped picture... I stitched two pics together to give you the full effect!

One of my all-time favorite Mormon Messages is "Create", based on a talk by President Dieter F. Uchtdorf. This short message, along with many other of the videos that the Church produces, inspire me to be a better person. They enlighten my mind and help me to be a more positive person in general, and I know that many other people feel the same way. I am glad for the message of optimism and hope that the Gospel brings!

CREATE

Phantom of the Opera!!

Alright, Phantom was way too good for me not to blog about it. I got to go see BYU's production on Friday night. Having just seen Phantom on Broadway this Thanksgiving, I was expecting an OK college-level performance. But I was blown away by the skill of all the main actors, and I found myself drawn into the story, once again. One thing I love about live theater is that each time you watch a play, you are seeing the one and only of that play, because it will never be done exactly the same again. I also love the freedom that actors have to depict their characters, because I find that every actor brings out a new side of each character that I had never thought of before. I also need to say, I think the Phantom's voice was AMAZING. Too bad he just proposed to his girlfriend ;) Ok, totally kidding. But my sister was disappointed when she heard that.

Now for some analysis. I thought that content was good, because I find that whenever I go to a show like this, I feel inspired, and I feel a little bit of that wonder that our friend Dr. Wesch was talking about. I think the wonder comes from seeing such a polished, high quality performance, no doubt the result of countless hours spent in preparation for the show. I think that shows such as Phantom could have a great impact for good by inspiring people, and especially young kids, to work on their talents, whatever those talents may be. With enough consistent hard work, dreams can come true. However, you have to have a dream before you shoot for it, and I think that the magic produced by Phantom has the potential to create such a vision within a person.

How DO Giraffes Sleep?

Ok. I just have to give a shout out to Dr. Michael Wesch's awesome speech he gave at the BYU forum yesterday. His speech was entitled, "The End of Wonder in the Age of Whatever," and he focused on how technology (the media!!) affects society and culture today. He made me rethink how I use technology. If you didn't get a chance to see it, it'll be up on byub.org and speeches.byu.edu.

Some of my favorite ideas from his speech:

• The trick about the "knowledge machine"--it only works with questions. If you don't have a question, it is only a distraction.
• A question is a QUEST. Questions have a profound capacity to connect us. They promote a meeting of minds, and allow us to embrace vulnerability.
• A classroom is successful if it not only gives you answers to your existing questions, but also creates many more new questions.
• Who we are is reflected back to us by those around us. How we treat others matters! As you lose yourself, you learn more about yourself.
• Technology can create boxes around us if we let it. Those boxes remove us from one another and decrease connection.
• “We cannot selectively numb emotions; when we numb the painful emotions, we also numb the positive emotions.” --Brené Brown
• A common attitude towards the amazing capacity of technology: “In the midst of a fabulous array of historically unprecedented and utterly mind‑boggling stimuli, whatever.” 
• Today, students in lecture halls experience a level of disengagement. They're learning to follow, they're learning how to successfully take exams, but they're not learning about the subject itself. Questions asked in this environment are based on what is on the exam, instead of questions that burn in the soul.
• Together, WE make the world. Embrace vulnerability. Establish connection. Join the symphony. Celebrate the actual, pursue the positive. Wonder!
• Like love, wonder is not just an experience, it's a CAPACITY.

He received a standing ovation :)

I Love Abe.

"Do you think we choose the times into which we are born? Or do we fit the times we are born into?"

 
Last night I went to see Lincoln. Being Canadian, I feel like I don't know as many nitty gritty details about American history. But I loved American Heritage, and I loved this movie! If you're looking for action-packed, you won't get it, but despite all the debates and politics, there's a lot of wit that pleasantly surprised me. And I know, this is Hollywood depiction of Abraham Lincoln, but I found myself really liking him. His reedy voice and quiet, kindly demeanor that compels everyone to stop and listen. His ability to listen and not jump to conclusions. It reminded me of Amazing Grace, if you've ever seen that. Awesome film as well :)

Be Willing To Stand Inside the Fire!

One thing I appreciate about media is its power to inspire. This song was introduced to me at the start of the semester in one of my other classes, and it has been in my head every single day since then. I guess that it has become sort of a theme song for me, because every time I feel scared, inadequate or even overwhelmed, this inevitably comes back to me.

In class, we discussed how in life, sometimes we think that we are safe from heartache and pain if we don't put ourselves out there, if we don't take risks and walk the line. Which is probably true. But is that really living a full life? I think that it's impossible to reach our full potential without being willing to be tested, to get outside of our comfort zone. We also need to be willing to suffer. Some of the greatest lessons that I have ever learned came out of situations where I was pushed past what I thought I could handle. Why are those experiences so meaningful? Tell me what you think.

Here's the video. Call me a baby, but I definitely cried at the end! The lyrics are underneath.
(oh... and sorry about the poor quality... and the weird band clips. It's old. But good. :P)

Song--Standing Outside the Fire

Artist--Garth Brooks

We call them cool
Those hearts that have no scars to show
The ones that never do let go
And risk the tables being turned

We call them fools
Who have to dance within the flame
Who chance the sorrow and the shame
That always comes with getting burned

But you've got to be tough when consumed by desire
'Cause it's not enough just to stand outside the fire

We call them strong
Those who can face this world alone
Who seem to get by on their own
Those who will never take the fall

We call them weak
Who are unable to resist
The slightest chance love might exist
And for that forsake it all

They're so hell-bent on giving ,walking a wire
Convinced it's not living if you stand outside the fire

Standing outside the fire
Standing outside the fire
Life is not tried, it is merely survived
If you're standing outside the fire

There's this love that is burning
Deep in my soul
Constantly yearning to get out of control
Wanting to fly higher and higher
I can't abide
Standing outside the fire

Standing outside the fire
Standing outside the fire
Life is not tried, it is merely survived
If you're standing outside the fire

Standing outside the fire
Standing outside the fire
Life is not tried, it is merely survived
If you're standing outside the fire